- Brandi: “We’ve all slept with everyone, right Yolanda? You and me? Because we’re the hottest housewives, right? I’ve got you, gurl.”
- Adrienne to Lisa: “Look, I accuse a lot of people of selling stories to TMZ. It’s nothing. Time to let bygones be bygones. Take one of my trees, friends?”
- Brandi to Lisa’s closet: “Fuck You”
- Lisa: “I’m older and wiser.” Brandi: “Well,you’re definitely older.”
- Brandi: “Kim blames me for all her drug and alcohol issues. I play a huge role in her life.”
- Kim: “Well, I got a boot and I can hear.”
- Portia to Lisa: “Hello dolling dolling dolling bye dolling.”
- Brandi to Lisa: “Keyword pump! Get it?”
- Kyle on Brandi: “I do enjoy seeing her face — both of them.”
- Kim to Kyle: “Look Kyle, I may not be able to come to your daughter’s birthday because uh well, um … I know I didn’t make this clear in Seasons 1 and 2 but um … I just don’t like you.”
Gifts this Ep:
- Tequila slip-and-slide mattress pad — from Brandi to Lisa
- Convertible Maserati — from Mauricio to Kyle
- Finally coming to someone’s lame party — from Kim to Lisa
- The F-You Tree — from Adrienne to Lisa
- Giacomino from Il Pastaeo
- Kathy Hilton’s new dress line
Beverly Hills fact drop:
- Il Pastaio is absolutely the most notorious BH resto you can go to. This is where the Persians, Beverly Hills ladies and so forth definitely flock. The patio is a total scene in a plastic surgery and women looking to land a man kind of way. The food is fantastic.
- Here’s the deal with double kissing in LA: It’s not a thing. It only happens when one person is NOT American. #RHOBH misuse. We would know.
- One must always make an effort to hide one’s line from Ibizia Tan (Brandi)
- New housewife Yolanda is cool, was discovered by Eileen Ford and has children with interesting L.A. names: Anwar, Bella, and Gigi.
- Brandi’s T-back side boob
- Kim’s vm is full because she drunk dialed herself. “Uh … I did see two missed calls from Portia …”
- Brandi’s house
- Kyle and Kathy thinking a boutonniere is current. “You’re joking. You’re joking right?”
- Taylor “lost” Russell
- White and pink Birkins
- The bigger the purse the smaller the ass (wrong). The higher the heel the closer to GOD (also wrong).
- Kim stills slurs without alcohol. “Uh just moooooved a leel bit closser juuust a leel bit closser” — Kim expaining where she lives.
- Who sends flowers to an event you’re not invited to? Wait a minute … Adrienne you little devil you …